experienced monday blues + bad moodswing tday.


was fine in th morning. then i bcame restless.
maybe it's cause of boring lessons. but i tried to stay normal. i tried to stay happy.
even isabel noticed im nt myslf tday, she told me to cheerup.
& i just replied, ' oh, im fine. just tired maybe '
but actually, i aint fine. everyone knws it. i knw it myslf best.


passed th day with a moodless-mood.
was feeling very low during th last period. it's a free period.
listen to music through my earpiece. lucky ms koh didnt restrict.
those sad songs, are really reminding me of some stuffs i've alr let go.
same routine after schl. went block to slack.
wrote some things on th letter for shihan. we're sending it to th boy's home.
was reminded of that again. i broke down, i cried.
it's countless times i've cried bcause of that already.
there's one time i cried for an hour or so in school. it's in school.

anw i felt better aftr crying out. thnks darling & co. for being there.
was veryveryvery low then. walked to compass and i headed home alone.
it feels good to be alone sometimes. thnks fr fufilling me that.

i guess you aint ready for a relationship like that. maybe we aint meant to be.
have you tried undrstanding me? even darling realised you dont undrstand me.
not even a little. one month has already passed. i gave you time to chnge, you took it fr granted.
how many times you said you'll chnge, but have you? you ask yourslf.
you knw it best. maybe im ridiculous asking you to chnge just for me.
but you're not playing your part as a boyfriend, as my so-called boyfriend.
when i cried, you aint there for me. where were you? somewhere else joking & laughign around?
I EVEN HEARD YOU LAUGHING. i've got nthing else to say. need some time to cool down.