with th beautiful eyes. tht hides th painted stars,
making it red-rimmed, a bit terrifying it may seem.
but th eyes are so blue, and so very very sad.
like th world has been unfair to them, like someone who has lost true love,
like th tears of a person, looking at th corpse of a loved one.
sad clown, i pity you. i feel sad for you are sad.
and your purpose is so cliched, tht you have to make people laugh,
whn your own heart is broken.
with your painted face, & your painted smile.
tht hides your sad eyes, & your sad smile.
D:!

today isnt great. today sucks. today's not my day.
got back report book in th morning.
results, okayokay. failed one in total. level position: 128/190.
conduct: good. results: passed. attendance: 84/93
comments: jesselyn is a pleasant pupil with a sweet disposition.
she has built good interpersonal relationships with her peers.
she is very creative, and exercises a lot of independence in her work.
that's how tcher thinks of me. that's hw i present myslf in schl.
but whn im home, whn im out. im totally different :] twosided me.
i have splits personaility. my mum said tht too.
she says, im like a mouse in schl, so quiet, dare not voice out my thoughts.
but whn im home, i roar like a tiger, i shout whnever im unhappy.
yeah, there's two different me. whn im out, im like im in schl.
so dnt worry too much tht you'ld be roared eh. i wn't do tht :]

went home straight after that. waited for th bus so freaking long.
bathed, changed & prepared. thn took 161 to wdlands interchange.
thought can catch th same bus as girlfr, but she missed it.
waited for her at wdlands intrchange. & thn took 169 to republic poly tgthr.
rushed to th workplace inside republic poly. fuck, im late -.-
alvin briefed me about th prices & stuffs. nag here nag there. _l_
thn julie came, th overall incharge. she sucks ley, fcuker.
keep on say what, why bring friend here. dnt keep talk to girlfr. -.-
stupid ass. & finally, she went for her class. alvin left too.

so, left me & girlfr to tend th store. fuck again. so damn bored eh.
we sat there form 11 till 5plus, only 2 out of 8 customers bought smthing.
others, = see here, touch there, ask some crap, thn walk away.
fooook. totally waste my time. & julie gave a very fcuked up face whn she return.
well, what's her problem. why not ask her ownslf come tend th store?
i tell you. it's damn bored. lucky got sister pei me chat on phone. thnks eh (:
left. without pay. without any pay. she say must ownslf go simei collect.
what fuck? fuck again. it's not my day today.

feeling so helpless now. thnks for those who cared, & asked me wht happen.
thnks swtheart, thnks tyngwoei korkor, thnks bastard, thnks regina nuer.
thnks yuenhe dahaoren, thnks engeline sister, thnks weixuan h.laogong.
thnks to all who cared, those who asked, those who are more concern thn i am.
meanwhile. i'll fake a smile. so you'll still see th happy side of me,
whn im hurting so badly deep down. tkecare people, loss for words.